The Sweetest Mom, The Sweetest Letter

October 17, 2012

My Dearest Daughter,

 As I write this letter to you on your 26^th birthday, I am filled with so many things, thankfulness, gladness, hope, inspiration, great joy, and some regrets. The regrets stem from the fact that as a teacher, I failed a major test: I did not trust God completely. When you were going through the trials, the fire, and the devil was trying to steal what God had intended for you, I hung my head down and wondered if God would do what he said. There were times when it seemed like heaven was silent and that there was no word from the Lord. The promises were far away, it seemed.

 I had to look at you each day when you were sick, but even then God always showed me your heart. You had the heart of a child that loved the Lord. You were beautiful even then because your light was shining so bright.

 It was crazy because I was afraid, but always excited. The scriptures remind us that God intends to do even more that we can comprehend and he has truly been faithful to his word. Not in a million years could I have foreseen this day: a day of celebration of your 26^th birthday and all the blessings that have come our way.

There were others when you were younger that were healthier, thought that they were more beautiful, etc, but a woman that loves the Lord has a value far above rubies. Look at how God gave you an intelligent mind, a beautiful encouraging and body spirit, how he brought you through the valley of the shadow of death, made you beautiful and blessed you with the resources and people that you needed to accomplish things in you.

 He gave you college degrees with such ease that I don’t think that you have even tapped into even half of your potentials. He has gone even further, he allowed you to go to Morehouse School of Medicine and graduate. He gave you a job in a weak economy and has blessed you to be a success in your own right.

 My mother would often say that she was the reason for my success, and to a degree she was right, but as your mother, I will feel that you are the Lord’s child, one of his favorites, and the Lord has only made me privilege to have three wonderful children to watch in my life. You are in this place now because of what God has done, not me. I had the hope for it , but God perfected the plans and dispensed them in his time. He has given you a season of harvest and he is not finished yet. He is going to send the former rains and the latter rains and filled your storehouse with overflows!

I want to tell you about the images that I have of you in my mind, most are not of the young lady that you are now, even though there are some. The most prevalent ones are of you , a little baby kicking your pretty legs in the crib, a baby girl with a winter cap wrapped around your head looking like an anointed child of God, a little baby girl holding her stuffed animal in the hospital, a little girl laughing with your friends, Tonita and Rashell, a little sick girl that prayed every day for another little girl that had AIDS, a little girl that had such a big heart that she would laugh and dance at St. Jude School in a ballet performance despite problems, my daughter that constantly enncourges , loves, and gives to her family and all that she meets.

 I am a proud mother and absolutely no one could replace you for me. I have been emerged in the well of blessings of the Lord and my soul has been saturated. I could write more, but I am just really trying to say that I love you because God has belessed me with my family; I am so grateful. I have the real deal! I don’t have to go looking for love in all of the wrong places.

Kristin, please, continue the legacy that the Lord has begun in you.

I hope this is not too mushy, but when I read 1Corinthians 13 and it says, “Now abideth faith, hope, and charity (love), these three, but the greatest of these is love”, I cannot help myself. I have faith in you because I know that God is in you; I have hope in you because I know how God has operated in your life, and I love you because God is love and His love is in you.

Thank you for this tremendous opportunity to be called your earthly mother. I really treasure this role.

Love, Your Mother,

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The love of a mother is unfailing. I am so thankful for her strength, her love, her sweet spirit and her love of God. At 26 years old I stand confident knowing that I understand how to be a real woman, what the value of life really is and the fear of the Lord.

 

Thank you mom, I love you more than words!

 

With Love,

Kristin Sarai

 

 

The Unexamined Life (Part 1)

I was talking to a friend yesterday in preparation for a project that 7 Degrees North Ministries is working on. He was sharing with me what his life looked like before coming into relationship with Christ. The theme was that he was self-consumed and habitually “lived in the moment”. It’s interesting because I have heard countless stories with the same theme….”before Christ, I never really thought about life beyond what was happening at the moment. I was only concerned with meeting my needs and enjoying the pleasures of life and sin”. This saga warrants my thoughts about the nature of humanity.

Babies are so selfish right from birth! Haha!! Seriously, have you ever just really thought about the nature of babies? They don’t care about anything or anyone besides them and their comfort and pleasure. Change My diaper so that I can be comfortable, give ME a bottle so that MY belly can be full, hold ME, show ME attention, I’m sleepy so I’m going to make everyone miserable until I go to sleep (I do love kids, I promise ). The forgiving aspect of this idea of selfishness in babies is that it is expected; they don’t know how to love effectively unless someone teaches them. It seems like a simple concept; however, this idea of selfishness becomes more complicated in adulthood.

As adults we have responsibilities, things that we do and say effect other people, the way that we live has implications on people in our lives and even people that we don’t know. With that in mind, if one never takes time to reflect on the past, consider decisions and the outcome of those decisions, and allow a perfect lover to teach them how to love and live effectively, the outcome is almost always a life that is self-destructive and externally destructive. An unexamined life is like a cigarette; it definitely harms the individual but the greater harm is to those who are around them. How often do you take time to really reflect on your life? What do you think will happen when you die? What is your purpose? Why did God create you? What legacy will you leave behind? Who or what will exist because of you? Who are you really?

I submit to you a challenge today. Take some time to reflect on the above questions. I would say that this is one of the most critically understandings that you will ever have to unfold. An understanding of this is foundational for the development and highest success of your life. I’ll give you a hint, ready? You didn’t create yourself…seek this knowledge in the creator of Your life…the creator of all Life…Jesus Christ. You won’t regret it, I promise. J

More to come.

With Love,

Kristin Sarai  

Trusting His Love

Well friends, I shared with you all earlier that I have been in Jesus boot camp since October 2011 (Happy One Year Anniversary to Me haha). Today I am confronted with more molding and pruning and as always, it is uncomfortable, yet extremely beneficial. I am so thankful that the Lord takes time to shine light on the areas of our lives that do not look like His character for the purpose of purifying and sanctifying us. At the moment that we truly give up our attempt to run aspects of our lives and allow the creator of our destiny and purpose to lead the way, is the moment that God becomes the personal trainer. I don’t know if you’ve ever had a trainer but usually while training is in progress you are in pain BUT, the more you press forward, you began to see the results of the training. The same is true with Jesus boot camp, the more you stick to it, you began to see the results displayed in all areas of your life.  

Today’s boot camp session that God specially designed for me was about faith and fear. I am almost embarrassed to say this but, this is a reoccurring area where God wants me to understand that I have to FULLY trust Him in order to do my life’s work and that He IS in control. You must understand this, I have seen God do some pretty miraculous things in not only my life, but in the lives of others (not to mention that the same God of the bible is the same God of today), I have seen the power of prayer in a very explicit way. Yet, there are moments in my life where I am easily fearful of what will or will not happen EVEN THOUGH God has explicitly told me what my life will look like and accomplish.   

God spoke to me through a familiar passage in Matthew 14 where he called Peter to walk on water to Him. Let’s take a look at the passage below:

²² Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. ²³ After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone, ²⁴ and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.

²⁵ Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. ²⁶ When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.

²⁷ But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”

²⁸ “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”

²⁹ “Come,” he said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. ³⁰ But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”

³¹ Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”

³² And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. ³³ Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.” Matthew 14:22-32

Just like Peter experienced, God has demonstrated His power, His love, and His ability to do supernatural works in our lives. In this short passage, we can identify a few things that translate to our lives today (I’ll highlight a couple). 1) Often we are not truly in expectation for God to do supernatural things in our lives. This is evident as we see that Peter and the others, although having experienced the power of Christ, were not truly in expectation of what God would do. They were terrified and experienced disbelief as Jesus walked across the water. How often have you read the bible and promises of God, God’s desire for those who Love Him (not just saying it but love Him through obedience) and are called according to his plan but not really expected for those things to happen in your life? God’s desire is that we will be in expectation for him to move according to His word in our lives. 2) The circumstances of our lives often cause us to lose focus and faith. Peter started out with his eyes on Christ (Good job Peter!!), then the waves began to crash and all of a sudden Peter took his eyes off of Christ (ahhhh!!! Come on Peter!!) and fixed them on what was happening around him. How often can you share the same experience with Peter? God has already told you (repeatedly) what the plan for your life is, He has directed your path, opened some doors and closed some doors, told you yes to some things and told you no (for your good) but the things that you see happening around you (or not happening) causes you to doubt what God said or become fearful.

Will you trust me? Do you truly believe the depth of love and concern that I have for you? When circumstances in your life don’t look the way that I have told you your life will be, will you STILL trust me? When everything that you see tells you not to believe, will you trust Me? These are the questions that God is posing to His children. To trust that He IS a loving father and that He WILL bring us to an expected end when we are operating in obedience and committed and submitted to His will.

I’ve heard it said (I didn’t say this, I just heard it said J ), “The most difficult task you will ever have to accomplish as a Christian is to believe that God loves you as much as He says He does”. This is the only reason why Christians ever worry, doubt, stress, or become weary. If we could just grasp hold of the depth of God’s love for us, our circumstances would never dictate our outlook on life. Daily we must challenge ourselves to trust God’s love more.

Ok Lord, I hear you. I’m pumping my faith weights and making conscious decisions not to pick up fear. Your word is true.

Lord thank you for your supreme authority and your long suffering love. Thank you for your patience in dealing with us as we strive to become more like you. Our desire is to live in your perfect will and for our lives to yield the highest amount of glory to YOU. Help us to keep our eyes fixed on you and never on our circumstances. Thank you for taking time to teach us more about you and ourselves. Thank you for the grace to endure until the end. Reflecting on your sacrifice and love on the cross for our sins fuels our fire to love you more and to trust you more. Lord you are everything. Thank you for your love. Help us to “Be still and know that you are God” (Psalms 46:9). Amen.

With Love,

Kristin Sarai